Ok so, lets back up a minute. the month before our miscarriage, we had been planning on making it over to the middle east, or wherever would hire us, to teach English. I love to make plans and then just move that direction. In January, we had saved up enough money for me to enroll in a CELTA course. We have a great number of friends who have done this and paid off student loans and lived overseas at the same time.
Seriously felt like an excellent plan to me! I am unsure when I stopped following Jesus and started following my plan. The miscarriage was a huge reality check for me. I remember thinking, “What the heck am I doing?” I am so thankful for God’s gentle ways. He is constantly reminding me that he is here and has something great planned for us.
Call me cheesy, but I really really believe it.
Since February, I have been thrown into a whirlwind of searching. What comes next if my plan isn’t going to happen? The only think I knew for sure was that I have to get out of the coffee business. Now this might come as a shock, but being a barista isn’t my life’s calling. What is though? I began a frazzled search for a new job.
I applied at 30 jobs in the first 3 weeks. I got a job interview at a place where the salary would provide long term financial stability. Now I admit, this is exactly what I was searching for. In my emotional upheaval I sought the first thing that would provide security… Money. And isn’t it incredibly interesting how Jesus doesn’t wan’t anything to be our security except for himself.
At my first interview with the company, they said they would ask a few serious candidates to return for a second interview. Thirty minutes after the conclusion of our time, the company emailed me and asked to schedule a second interview the following business day. Feeling confident in my prospect at gaining a job so quickly, I went to a Starbucks to watch one of my favorite TV shows and enjoy a frozen beverage.
Then, God blessed me with a phone call from a complete stranger.
A woman who, had heard my name from a mutual acquaintance and wanted help from me. You see, she too is interested in building bridges between Muslims and Christians. I can tell you that I had more excitement, more energy, more hope in my own calling from that one phone call than any job I had my hopes in. In this few moments on the phone, I received tremendous confirmation about what my calling is and I am excited do it.
And that my friends, is why we are embarking on a journey to trust Jesus more completely. We believe that God is asking us to live a life that is more dependent on Him. More specifically, God is asking me to live a life more dependent on Him. We think that this looks like fundraising my salary so that I can work to build bridges full-time. So this is the reason for my blog. This is a journey. This is the record of my hope in Jesus to provide in unforeseen ways. And I hope you will join me on this journey.